March 31, 2011

Thoughts on a Thursday

Sorry it's been so quiet around these parts lately, life has gotten incredibly hectic as the wedding creeps closer and my blood pressure silently goes through the roof. Who knew that planning a "small" wedding could be so stressful? Every time I feel like I've gotten something major finished and I remind myself to keep breathing, someone reminds me about three more things that need to be done rightthissecond. My to-do list for the next few days looks a little something like this:
...and I started adding to the back of it this morning. As excited as I am about this wedding (and as sure as I am that it will all be worth it in the end), just looking at this list makes me want to crawl back into bed and ask Toby to breathe his awful cat breath in the face of anyone who comes close. Unfortunately, though, these things aren't going to cross themselves off... and as my father reminded me this morning, the excuse that the wedding "isn't until next month" only works for another 8 hours or so.
Thankfully, I'm not in this completely alone: my mother and best friend have been so wonderfully helpful, and I've had at least 15 other friends offer to help out with all kinds of things. Dan has been doing absolutely everything he can to help, despite the fact that he spends most of the week out of town and has a pretty serious day job with which to contend. Everyone else I've worked with so far -- the caterer, the people who are in charge of our "venue," the ladies who made and printed our invitations -- has been incredibly sweet and attentive. I am so grateful for all of this help and I know that without it, I probably would have already cracked under the pressure. At this point, though, most of the things left to do are not so easily delegated, meaning that the entire list up there is filled with things that I alone need to take care of... pronto.
As if this weren't enough to think about, I'm also in the midst of the "my wedding is in less than a month and I have to look fabulous in this dress or I'll never be able to live with myself" freakout. Add that to the "my soon-to-be-husband is leaving for a war zone in approximately two months and I have a tendency to eat my feelings" syndrome, and we have some major issues. I've been pushing myself really hard lately to eat right and work out as much as possible in an effort to combat both stress and pudge. I've never before understood how people could claim that running calmed them down (nothing about sweating profusely and struggling to breathe really says 'calm' to me), but now I'm starting to find that 45 minutes on the treadmill each day acts like mental housekeeping, sweeping up the mess left by the billion thoughts zinging around my brain. I leave the gym refreshed, relaxed, and simply too tired to think about anything important. There are other reasons (for another post) for the fact that I am pushing myself harder than ever before to get in these miles, but one of the biggest is that provides a much needed reboot to my weary head. That and because the more I work out, the more I can eat, even though we're rapidly approaching Def-Con 2 for wedding weight loss and toning.
Luckily, there is a big bright light at the end of this tunnel: I have an amazing best friend who has booked us massages and pedicures for this weekend. I am so incredibly excited to relax a little bit, spend time with her, and get cute toes out of the bargain!


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